socio-political self-help and stuff
some of you may not agree with what i am about to say. that’s okay. i can only write through the lens of the life i’ve lived…
it is not your job to save everyone who needs help around you.
sometimes, you just can’t. you look over and see that someone you love is metaphorically drowning in a giant wave of bs and you want so bad for them to get out of it. to take hold of the board you’ve placed at their disposal. to stop drowning over there. to get it to-freakin-gether.
it is not up to you.
sometimes, you have to let them drown. i know. harsh. which isn’t easy at all. even more so when it’s someone you love. but when you put yourself out on that wave with them, trying to do all that you can to force them to stand on your board… you run the risk of falling off yourself. and drowning in your own desire – for whatever reason your may have. taking your eyes off of what you need for and in your life. you see, when you invest all of your time and energetic resources into another person, you run the risk of depleting your own. especially when that person has not asked for your help. or is in a place where they cannot accept it.
it is not your place to make that call.
sometimes. no, every time, you cannot want change on behalf of another. sure, you can wish it for them. but you cannot demand that they fall in line with your idea of what’s best for their life. because, really, maybe that near death, rock bottom experience is exactly what they need to get it together. maybe they need to fill their lungs with water for a moment, in order to truly appreciate the breath of life that belongs to them. it is up to them to do what they have to do in order to survive. this is not to say that you turn your back on someone who is in need and unable to act in their best interest (say, true life or death – call the freaking ambulance already!). this is to say that you cannot waste time getting someone to behave a certain way, change a certain pattern, or be a certain person – if it is not what they want.
it is your place to save yourself.
sometimes, that’s all you can do.